Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Got Milk?

Yea I know the title is a pathetic rip off but it's the content that matters. Last year I decided to keep track of how much milk I drank in 365 days and what I found out kind of disappointed me. Before I tell you the number, let me set the scene for you. I was standing in the kitchen drinking milk(of course) after eating a ridiculous amount of homemade cookies and I looked up and asked my shitty roommate(Neil), "how many gallons of milk do you think I drink in a year?" His lame ass didn't have an answer so I decided to keep track.

The date: February 6th, 2013-0 gallons.

I first had to decide on a system to keep track. That was easy enough as I chose to just keep the caps from each gallon of milk I drank. They were first kept in a drawer and eventually transferred to a big Ziploc bag as I moved twice in the year. I also kept a piece of scratch paper with tally marks as I switched to Kwik Trip's half gallon bags of milk(cause they were cheaper and we'll get to the total cost). One year later, I finally had an answer.

The date: February 6th, 2014-117 gallons.

You might think that is a lot, and it probably is, but I was hoping for a bigger number around 135 or so. Anyways that's my number and let's put it into perspective.

That's a gallon of milk every 3.12 days.

At $3/gallon(rough estimate), I spent $351 on milk over a one year span.

I could have driven my car(if it ran on milk) 3,495 miles. That's coast to coast baby!

If I stacked all of those gallons on top of each other it would be just short of a 10 story building(97.5 ft).

A cow pisses out 5 gallons per day, I drank 1 cows milk output for 23.4 days.

Drinking a gallon an hour it would have taken me 4 days and 21 hours straight to finish them all.

So maybe I was wrong, it is a lot of milk. Just let this be a lesson to all of the little kids out there, if you don't want old man Osteoporosis to fuck with you, just drink a ton of milk. Stay thirsty my friends(mainly for milk but yea alcohol too).

Makes me tear up just looking at this beauty.

The Lounge Chair Legends