Wednesday, November 2, 2016

Hard Knocks: Week 8 Recap


As anticipated, YO TEAM IS BOOTY!!!! fell to Rustic Raiders. The final score ended up being a far bigger embarrassment for Coach Dale Earnhardt Sr. as BOOTY!!!! struggled to even fill up their roster for the showdown. Now with a .500 record, Coach Walker has his work cut out for him in the final weeks leading up to the playoffs.


"If I'm being honest with you guys, I mailed it in this week. I probably could have put in a little effort and Coached us to a victory but beating that chump Ellis Sr. isn't really an accomplishment. I mean this clown gets called a tough guy a couple of times and he loses his shit? Somebody who gets that easily offended isn't fit to be in charge of anything. Anyways, I'm not mad at you assholes for putting up a league low 75 points. This was like a bye week for us and now we have to step up like Channing Tatum or we'll be watching the playoffs AGAIN! No strip clubs, no booz, and definitely NO HOOKERS tonight. I expect everybody to be sober and at practice tomorrow ready to go."


Then Coach Walker had some harsh words for his former best friend.

"Let me start by saying Coach Dale Earnhardt Ellis Sr. is dead to me. He may still be walking around but he's nothing but a pair of shoes. As I told the guys in the locker room, we could have easily won today but I wanted to make the rest of the season a challenge. The worst team in the league is coming to town next week so I'm already prepping for week 10. The playoffs are there for the taking and I won't let this team fail again."


Coach Walker is determined to make the playoffs but was throwing the week 8 match up against an inferior opponent the smartest move? Either way, YO TEAM IS BOOTY!!!! will likely have to go 3-2 or 4-1 to achieve their goal. A victory against bottom feeder Labatt Sign Smashers would be a good place to start.

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